Particular flavours

at the hypermartBecause it is compulsory to go to a supermarket anywhere Naomi and I travel to, I got to see the varieties of potato crisps on the shelves. No mere salt ‘n’ vinegar chippies for the Chinese! Alongside the shelves of knock-offs, there were cucumber flavor potato chips from Lays!

Normally if I had a craving for cucumbers and potato chips at the same time, I’d have gone and bought cucumbers and potato chips. But the damn Chinese, they think of everything, including combined cravings for cucumbers and potato chips.

And while chicken-flavoured snacks are not new, they’ve gone one better, the Chinese. There were ‘crispy drumstick flavor’ potato crisps; For tomato-flavour afficionados, there were cherry tomato flavor potato crisps, and if you fancied BBQ ribs… you get the idea.

No, wait. There was the big daddy of them all – Italian Red Meat Flavor. Though what animal the red meat was from wasn’t specified.

at the hypermartWe also saw more of Stefanie Sun’s photos in the one supermarket than anywhere in Singapore. She’s selling all manner of foodstuff in China, and classier ones too (if you consider Lays classy) compared with what Gong Li (the unintelligible woman in Miami Vice) is flogging – some orange flavoured biscuits which look like if you ate them, you have to pamper yourself after with L’Oreal products.

I have a friend who wouldn’t have minded us buying her some Stefanie Sun (red meat or white?) flavoured snacks, nor Gong Li scented ones, but that’s another weird story I don’t want to get into now.

But then you’d want to forgive the Chinese for all their weirdness because in Shanghai, you can get a really decent Italian lunch for under S$15 at this place called Da Marco’s, which, after eating, we discovered to be within the building we were staying at, and needn’t have had to walk out in the rain bitching in the first place.

Being the gluttons that we were, we over-ordered of course and had to take out half a pizza, half a plate of fusili and a quarter slice of lasagne, then we spent a minute deciphering the Filipina waitress saying ‘fapeow mum’ repeatedly when we paid for our meals.

Turns out, or at least I’m guessing, she was asking Naomi if she wanted an official receipt.

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14 responses to “Particular flavours”

  1. emigre Avatar

    Oh…absolutely check out the local supermarkets when you are outside Singapore.

    You don’t know what treasures you’ll find.

    Me and my family go one step further. Being regular mathematically-inclined Singaporeans, we compare prices. If they are more expensive, we have the satisfaction of knowing we pay less at home. If they are cheaper than home, we buy some of the stuff. Yeah…sick huh.

  2. emigre Avatar

    Oh…absolutely check out the local supermarkets when you are outside Singapore.

    You don’t know what treasures you’ll find.

    Me and my family go one step further. Being regular mathematically-inclined Singaporeans, we compare prices. If they are more expensive, we have the satisfaction of knowing we pay less at home. If they are cheaper than home, we buy some of the stuff. Yeah…sick huh.

  3. J.. Avatar
    J..

    hahaha…

    “Fa Piao” Ma’am? (??, Ma’am?)

    they speak rojak language too.

  4. J.. Avatar
    J..

    hahaha…

    “Fa Piao” Ma’am? (发票, Ma’am?)

    they speak rojak language too.

  5. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    But they understand broken Mandarin too, as ours is.

  6. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    But they understand broken Mandarin too, as ours is.

  7. nal Avatar

    I don’t think its a Singaporean thing, this comparing prices. My Filipina friend always converts everything into pesos, and then proceeds to laugh herself silly at how much we pay for housing and cars.

  8. nal Avatar

    I don’t think its a Singaporean thing, this comparing prices. My Filipina friend always converts everything into pesos, and then proceeds to laugh herself silly at how much we pay for housing and cars.

  9. Nicholas Avatar
    Nicholas

    Wait till you hear them do ‘Jingle Bells’ over the supermarket PA.

  10. Nicholas Avatar
    Nicholas

    Wait till you hear them do ‘Jingle Bells’ over the supermarket PA.

  11. jackson Avatar

    They really do think of everything don’t they?

    Question: What do crispy drumsticks taste like? Deep friend pieces of wood?

    How should “crispy” taste?

  12. jackson Avatar

    They really do think of everything don’t they?

    Question: What do crispy drumsticks taste like? Deep friend pieces of wood?

    How should “crispy” taste?

  13. J. Avatar
    J.

    eh, miyagi. when it’s ur turn to pay, it will be: ???”?”?
    speaking of Jingle Bells, i once read of this humorous translation. jingle bells, jingle bells! jingle all the way! mandarin: ???????! ??????

  14. J. Avatar
    J.

    eh, miyagi. when it’s ur turn to pay, it will be: 发票,”蛇”?
    speaking of Jingle Bells, i once read of this humorous translation. jingle bells, jingle bells! jingle all the way! mandarin: 金狗表,金狗表! 金狗鹅的尾!

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