Of beauty rich and rare

I am not looking forward to going for my reservist training.

My battle-hardened (water fights in the bathroom) unit will be sent to North Queensland and put in the bush for the most part of 20 days. I’m not too sure how I’ll hold up. There’ll be intermittent mobile phone access, but fuck me dead, NO INTERNET!

There are several things I need to buy to entertain myself and the rest of the boys. During the last four in-camp trainings, I had appointed myself the official platoon girlie magazine supplier. Girly magazines being Her World, Female and any other women’s magazine that helped bring out our feminine side. Because as you know, being the fiercest platoon in the fiercest combat team in the fiercest armoured battle group does make you neglect that bit of your personality.

In the last four in-camps, I’ve tried several brands of personal care products brought in by the boys, and we’ve swapped personal care tips like which facial wash is good, which foot lotion prevents stinky feet, and from me, they’ve learnt that panty-liners in hats and helmets prevent heat rash.

Reading Cleo, on the other hand, is disruptive. Most of the boys tend to get a little disturbed, and halfway through a long trek in the jungle, would suddenly spew spoken thoughts such as “Eh, so, women orgasm is got different kind one ah?”, to which an MG-Gunner or Section Commander would say something like “Yah, you dunno meh? Got large, got small, got loud, got soft”, to which the LAW-Gunner might go, “Eh, Sergeant, you know meh? You virgin what”. (Actually, the LAW-Gunner (not his real vocation) is usually bitchier and would probably go, “Yah, you dunno meh? Your girlfriend only got one kind ah? Maybe she’s saving the other varieties for other people, hahahaha!”)

Or maybe we’ll just keep quiet and enjoy the wide open country, the clear blue skies and the not so clear red dust. See how.


…abounds in nature’s gifts, …veddy good source of facial mudpack.

iTunes is playing an illegal copy of I Still Call Australia Home from the album “Singer-Songwriter: The Anthology” by Peter Allen of which I have the original CD.

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22 responses to “Of beauty rich and rare”

  1. BrainCoder Avatar

    u have to be positive towards reservist(no sarcasm).

  2. BrainCoder Avatar

    u have to be positive towards reservist(no sarcasm).

  3. Michael Chua Avatar

    At least you get to enjoy the scenery of Australia’s outback for free (on taxpayers’ expense of course no doubt). And SAF has to pay you for it anyway. Indeed, might as well make the most of it and enjoy it.

  4. Michael Chua Avatar

    At least you get to enjoy the scenery of Australia’s outback for free (on taxpayers’ expense of course no doubt). And SAF has to pay you for it anyway. Indeed, might as well make the most of it and enjoy it.

  5. Anthony Avatar

    Wah lau. You damned de suay man.

    Good luck.

  6. Anthony Avatar

    Wah lau. You damned de suay man.

    Good luck.

  7. Merenwen Avatar

    Please take loads of pics of you and the guys. The filthier and muddier the better. Wooh!

  8. Merenwen Avatar

    Please take loads of pics of you and the guys. The filthier and muddier the better. Wooh!

  9. karebu Avatar
    karebu

    “panty-liners in hats and helmets prevent heat rash.”

    Erh, you sure boh? Sounds kinda wrong.

  10. karebu Avatar
    karebu

    “panty-liners in hats and helmets prevent heat rash.”

    Erh, you sure boh? Sounds kinda wrong.

  11. urahara-san Avatar

    hey mr miyagi ! guess i’ll see ya in aussie den ! lol i’m supporting ur unit ! haha dun be alarmed … not a stalker or anything lah ! can ask which date u all flying ?

  12. urahara-san Avatar

    hey mr miyagi ! guess i’ll see ya in aussie den ! lol i’m supporting ur unit ! haha dun be alarmed … not a stalker or anything lah ! can ask which date u all flying ?

  13. breakit Avatar
    breakit

    guys sure need some beauty tips. good one there to help promote the sharing of beauty tips back in camp (: but the panty liner method sounds sick (no offence).

  14. breakit Avatar
    breakit

    guys sure need some beauty tips. good one there to help promote the sharing of beauty tips back in camp (: but the panty liner method sounds sick (no offence).

  15. eLsi3 Avatar

    ho ho ho.

    i got a question. why do guys read girl mags?

    my brother does that too. my ex-bf does that too.

    hmmmmm. i really dun get it.

    im a girl. and i dont read men’s mags.

    or maybe im just weird.

    have fun during reservist training. it’ll soon be over. bear with it. ganbatte! ( =

  16. eLsi3 Avatar

    ho ho ho.

    i got a question. why do guys read girl mags?

    my brother does that too. my ex-bf does that too.

    hmmmmm. i really dun get it.

    im a girl. and i dont read men’s mags.

    or maybe im just weird.

    have fun during reservist training. it’ll soon be over. bear with it. ganbatte! ( =

  17. Mr Scott Avatar
    Mr Scott

    Perhaps you could get a Blackberry? Would that help?

  18. Mr Scott Avatar
    Mr Scott

    Perhaps you could get a Blackberry? Would that help?

  19. Mr Miyagi Avatar
    Mr Miyagi

    Panty liners work. Plus they have that nifty self-adhesive thing. Once sweat-laden, tear off and dispose (responsibly). Just don’t use ‘pre-loved’ ones, and there’s nothing kinky about it.

    Blackberry no help when no cellular signal. I can sms (and hopefully mms) from the two base stations in Shoalwater Bay.

    Women’s magazines are more informative.

  20. Mr Miyagi Avatar
    Mr Miyagi

    Panty liners work. Plus they have that nifty self-adhesive thing. Once sweat-laden, tear off and dispose (responsibly). Just don’t use ‘pre-loved’ ones, and there’s nothing kinky about it.

    Blackberry no help when no cellular signal. I can sms (and hopefully mms) from the two base stations in Shoalwater Bay.

    Women’s magazines are more informative.

  21. mintia Avatar
    mintia

    hmmm… maybe i might just get Dave a huge packet of panty liners then. hahaha! =P you boy take care and have fun in Kangaroo land then!

  22. mintia Avatar
    mintia

    hmmm… maybe i might just get Dave a huge packet of panty liners then. hahaha! =P you boy take care and have fun in Kangaroo land then!

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