Cowboy Caleb sez ‘be consistent in your content’ or something or other. And while I hardly ever apologize for the content of this glob, I’ve been told that the very thing that draws people here is the fact that I drop names and pictures of famous people (even Cowboy’s taken to this, though I think he likes Cheryl Fox ‘cos she’s got a porn star name) and gossip about them, and lately I haven’t been doing that enough.
So, here ’tis:
This morning, while I’m driving a doe, a deer, a very attractive female friend, someone calls on the mobile while I don’t have the handsfree attached and it’s Steph Song!
I hear a whole bunch of expletives, and decide, ok, this one important, better put on handsfree:
You little shit! MISTER MIYAGI eh? My friend emailed me the link to your blog!, said Miss Song, calling all the way from L.A. and not looking a day over 25.
But it’s a blog, and the readers know not everything here is true, and they’ll believe what they want to believe anyway, and they probably believe I don’t really know Steph Song!
Fuck, of course they wanna believe you know me! And I know lotsa people read your blog, or else my friend wouldn’t have emailed me!
That is so not true!
It is, you little meanie! Look at what you did to Fiona Xie!
OK. So, how’s L.A.?
L.A.’s fine, but it’s getting expensive, so I’m coming back. So, can you stop people reading about me on your blog?
Har? You’re coming back? OK, I’ll ask the readers very nicely to stop reading about you here.
You little shit! You’re such an asshole! What did I do to you?
Oh come on! Fair game! How’dja find my new phone number anyways?
I ain’t tellin’ ya, you little shit, you’re gonna write it in your blog, MISTER MIYAGI!
Why don’t you start your own blog and write stuff about me lah!
So, please, all youse readers of this here glob, don’t read the bits about Steph Song, ok? All untrue. Even the stuff I’ve just written.