There’s a hooligan in every one of us

Listening to: Rhyfelgyrch Gwyrharlech (Men Of Harlech) – Welsh Male Voices – Very Best Of The Festival Of One Thousand Welsh Male Voices [UK]

Cheebye! Lie down some more!I didn’t go to the gym yesterday because I was a little under the weather. And I missed the excitement (read: trouble) my mates got themselves into.

Lately, because our mate S is back from Sydney for good, and he’s brought back some good old fashioned Aussie values – such as ‘a good punch never hurt anyone‘ especially when executed in the proper context, such as on the footy paddock, in the pub, outside the pub, inside the gym, outside the gym, hell, most anywhere, we’ve been doing the pub circuit, (watching) rugby, gymming, going shopping for clothes, looking for nice places to eat…. generally what the typical Aussie bloke would do on a weekend in Sydney.

S and H were warming up on the treadmill, trying to run 3km in 10 minutes or something, and S started giggling quite audibly, as is his habit, because the telly in front of him was screening ‘America’s Funniest Home Videos’ or something. The fella (according to H, late 30s, balding, unfit looking bastard) on the treadmill next to him shushed him quite loudly, and for some reason, S, who is usually pretty even tempered, took offence, turned to H and asked loudly, ‘you mean you can’t talk in the gym’? 30-something-bald-bastard responds, saying, ‘yeah, go ask the instructor!’. S slams the emergency stop button on his mill, goes and seeks out the nearest instructor, who also happens to be the biggest bodybuilt monster, but who tells S, ‘no, you can talk in the gym’.

Vindicated somewhat, S gets back on his mill, tells Bald Bastard, ‘it’s ok to talk in the gym’, looks at the speed he’s running at, which is 8.9km/h, then announces to H, ‘Come, let’s warm up, AND MAKE SURE WE RUN FASTER THAN 9KM/H!’

Bald Bastard gets worked up now, probably because he doesn’t like the whole world to know he trundles at 8.9km/h for 20 minutes, and issues a challenge to S, ‘You have a problem? Come, let’s go outside and settle!’

S of course accepts by slamming his emergency stop button again, and grabs his towel and says, ‘SET, COME LAH! WHO SCARED WHO?’.

It never eventuates into fisticuffs. Mr 8.9km/h knew better than to follow S outside.

(What was funnier was that when S announced ‘let’s run faster than 9km/h’ to H, the guy running next to H got alarmed, looked at H, looked at the odometer on H’s treadmill, looked at H again, then looked straight ahead and continued trundling at a pace significantly less than 9km/h.)

Still, I think we’d better watch ourselves. Maybe the Rugby-Curry-Beer-Gym thing is making our testosterone go through the roof. It becomes a dangerous combination when you’re old enough not to run fast enough but you’re still dumb enough to pick a fight.

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21 responses to “There’s a hooligan in every one of us”

  1. My RSSs Mr Brown Rockson Roy Ng Stylemywords Scott Adams RSSMiyagi

  2. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    You have 3 blogs you maintain? Wow. Which one would you recommend be visited more? Thank you for your praises, albeit I know of a lot of others who write better and who are consistently sane. You would most likely be one of them *grin*

    I believe it was Horace as well who said:

    “Sapias, uina liques, et spatio breui
    spem longam reseces. Dum loquimur, fugerit inuida
    aetas: carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero.”

    Be wise, strain the wine, and trim distant hope within
    short limits. While we’re talking, grudging time will already
    have fled: seize the day, trusting as little as possible in tomorrow.

  3. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    You have 3 blogs you maintain? Wow. Which one would you recommend be visited more? Thank you for your praises, albeit I know of a lot of others who write better and who are consistently sane. You would most likely be one of them *grin*

    I believe it was Horace as well who said:

    “Sapias, uina liques, et spatio breui
    spem longam reseces. Dum loquimur, fugerit inuida
    aetas: carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero.”

    Be wise, strain the wine, and trim distant hope within
    short limits. While we’re talking, grudging time will already
    have fled: seize the day, trusting as little as possible in tomorrow.

  4. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    This is ‘where the action’s at’.
    Caught me out on this one. I don’t know much about Horace. Or rather, I don’t remember most of what I’ve read (which is why I can keep books forever. Re-reading them is like reading new books). 🙂

  5. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    This is ‘where the action’s at’.
    Caught me out on this one. I don’t know much about Horace. Or rather, I don’t remember most of what I’ve read (which is why I can keep books forever. Re-reading them is like reading new books). 🙂

  6. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    This is ode 1.11…We had latin in school, which is like 11 years worth so it sticks to mind. Virgil was more to my liking, though Horace has more “joie de vivre”…i dont even know if I spelled that right *lol*

  7. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    This is ode 1.11…We had latin in school, which is like 11 years worth so it sticks to mind. Virgil was more to my liking, though Horace has more “joie de vivre”…i dont even know if I spelled that right *lol*

  8. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    11 years of Latin! I ENVY! I had 12 years of Mandarin. And failed. Only Latin I learned was at Law School, where I was ostracised because I giggled at ‘Nudum Pactum’ and ‘Functus Officio’ cos I thought they sounded rude.

  9. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    11 years of Latin! I ENVY! I had 12 years of Mandarin. And failed. Only Latin I learned was at Law School, where I was ostracised because I giggled at ‘Nudum Pactum’ and ‘Functus Officio’ cos I thought they sounded rude.

  10. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    I ENVY your having learned mandarin..im struggling thru learning online with a stupid goat of a teacher who wont accept “zhao an, wan an or wu an” and insists on the the long formal way of saying them…zhaoshang hao etc…its a miracle I passed the test and its only the first unit on greetings..yeeesh…

    The accents are a bit difficult but a friend of mine gave me a tip on how to move my head to get it to sound off right *giggle*

    I hope Im able to speak it eventually..mandarin is such a beautiful language to listen to. I want to be able to write calligraphy too…

    *sigh* dream dream dream

  11. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    I ENVY your having learned mandarin..im struggling thru learning online with a stupid goat of a teacher who wont accept “zhao an, wan an or wu an” and insists on the the long formal way of saying them…zhaoshang hao etc…its a miracle I passed the test and its only the first unit on greetings..yeeesh…

    The accents are a bit difficult but a friend of mine gave me a tip on how to move my head to get it to sound off right *giggle*

    I hope Im able to speak it eventually..mandarin is such a beautiful language to listen to. I want to be able to write calligraphy too…

    *sigh* dream dream dream

  12. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Ack! You’re still up! What timezone are you at? I just wrote a longish email to your hotmail account too. Say you got it preeeze!

    BTW: http://www.voiceware.co.kr/english/demo/demo_text.html

    a site I use to cut and paste chinese words to find out what they’re supposed to sound like. Only mildly successful, cos the computer can speak faster than I can listen.

  13. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Ack! You’re still up! What timezone are you at? I just wrote a longish email to your hotmail account too. Say you got it preeeze!

    BTW: http://www.voiceware.co.kr/english/demo/demo_text.html

    a site I use to cut and paste chinese words to find out what they’re supposed to sound like. Only mildly successful, cos the computer can speak faster than I can listen.

  14. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Don’t they have calligraphy courses in your neck of the woods? I had compulsory calligraphy in primary school too, but I cheated, and used magic markers to do the homework.

  15. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Don’t they have calligraphy courses in your neck of the woods? I had compulsory calligraphy in primary school too, but I cheated, and used magic markers to do the homework.

  16. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    Working the night shift, going global does have its price *sigh*
    Its not so bad really, at least its not hot when i come in to work.

    They do but it doesnt make sense to learn calligraphy if you dont understand what your doin gor why. I see chinese calligraphy as a relationship between character, meaning, and the calligrapher. Only when the 3 are 1 will it make sense. Calligraphy is like art in my way of thinking. Its personal..from the style to the mesage put forth. Those can be 2 different things when accomplished.

  17. Gulaman Girl Avatar

    Working the night shift, going global does have its price *sigh*
    Its not so bad really, at least its not hot when i come in to work.

    They do but it doesnt make sense to learn calligraphy if you dont understand what your doin gor why. I see chinese calligraphy as a relationship between character, meaning, and the calligrapher. Only when the 3 are 1 will it make sense. Calligraphy is like art in my way of thinking. Its personal..from the style to the mesage put forth. Those can be 2 different things when accomplished.

  18. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    alt: OMG! MEN MEN MEN! BIG BURLY BRAWL INDEED! *bleah*

  19. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    alt: OMG! MEN MEN MEN! BIG BURLY BRAWL INDEED! *bleah*

  20. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Addendum: One of my part-time employees couldn’t make her schedule because SHE got into a fight. Punches were thrown and she apparently opened a wound on her adversary’s eye. So, SHE’S got one up on us boys, who are mostly talk and not much action. Then again, she’s only 20.

  21. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    Addendum: One of my part-time employees couldn’t make her schedule because SHE got into a fight. Punches were thrown and she apparently opened a wound on her adversary’s eye. So, SHE’S got one up on us boys, who are mostly talk and not much action. Then again, she’s only 20.

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