Copywriter from hell (or just a really bad school)?

Think of toilet, think of you
No, think of wiping my backside, think of you.

“Think of tissue, think of us”, reads the tagline. I am certain this was written by the copywriter who wrote the equally memorable taglines for Caffe Roma, whose ads on taxi bumpers and buses read, “Less of Fat, Less of You”; and Nescafe Singapore (strangely no local site), one of whose ads reads “One Less Reason To Diet”, which makes sense, only if you’d go, ‘OK, so, Nescafe is one less reason to diet. Drinking Nescafe gives you one less reason to diet, so maybe the more I drink Nescafe the less reasons I have to diet. Ah fuck it! I’ll drink Nescafe all day all night (because I won’t be able to sleep anyway) and I won’t have to think about my diet at all’.

Or, you might go, ‘Hey Dad, you know what? Now got laxative coffee you know? Last time only got the laxative tea’.

Damn, the copywriter’s a genius.

Less of fat, less of you!
Less of fat, less of you!

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14 responses to “Copywriter from hell (or just a really bad school)?”

  1. My RSSs Mr Brown Rockson Roy Ng Stylemywords Scott Adams RSSMiyagi

  2. myyaki Avatar
    myyaki

    Not only Nescafe no local site, 7-Eleven also got no local site.

  3. myyaki Avatar
    myyaki

    Not only Nescafe no local site, 7-Eleven also got no local site.

  4. myyaki Avatar
    myyaki

    Not only Nescafe no local site, 7-Eleven also got no local site.

  5. Adelaide Avatar
    Adelaide

    so long as the pict looks goot, words sounding smart, whoa ho ho…send for Archive mag!!! who cares anyhoo

  6. Adelaide Avatar
    Adelaide

    so long as the pict looks goot, words sounding smart, whoa ho ho…send for Archive mag!!! who cares anyhoo

  7. Adelaide Avatar
    Adelaide

    so long as the pict looks goot, words sounding smart, whoa ho ho…send for Archive mag!!! who cares anyhoo

  8. Susan S. Avatar
    Susan S.

    Back in the 80s, Calcan dog food company had a comercial with the slogan ‘Calcan: Put good things into dog to get good things out of them.” Never mind that the video under the text showed a dog winning a dog show; when my sister and I heard that voice over, we couldn’t believe our ears. First we look at each other with amazement. Then we laughed until we cried.

  9. Susan S. Avatar
    Susan S.

    Back in the 80s, Calcan dog food company had a comercial with the slogan ‘Calcan: Put good things into dog to get good things out of them.” Never mind that the video under the text showed a dog winning a dog show; when my sister and I heard that voice over, we couldn’t believe our ears. First we look at each other with amazement. Then we laughed until we cried.

  10. Susan S. Avatar
    Susan S.

    Back in the 80s, Calcan dog food company had a comercial with the slogan ‘Calcan: Put good things into dog to get good things out of them.” Never mind that the video under the text showed a dog winning a dog show; when my sister and I heard that voice over, we couldn’t believe our ears. First we look at each other with amazement. Then we laughed until we cried.

  11. Note to all copywriters…

    The word “spend” is a verb, not a noun. You cannot say a discount is valid “with minimum spend of $100”. You can say valid with “an order of at least $100” or “a purchase of at least $100″….

  12. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    “Put good things into dog to get good things out of them” hahahaha.

  13. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    “Put good things into dog to get good things out of them” hahahaha.

  14. Mr Miyagi Avatar

    “Put good things into dog to get good things out of them” hahahaha.

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